Okay, so its been awhile...been just a tad bit busy...
Sis-in-law's wedding was last weekend. It was beautiful if I do say so myself. I was thrilled for her. Her day went just as she wanted it. So I was pumped. I slept 7 hours in 2 days, but it was completely worth it. Just to see her relaxed and enjoying her self and so happy. Lord knows at my wedding, I was the exact opposite. But of course, she knew all she had to do was hollar and I would do whatever she needed so she had no reason to stress. Hey, that's what I am here for! :)
A week ago was March 16. It was one month since dad died. It was a hard day. Its still hard to actually grasp that even happened. It gets a little easier as time goes on, but the thought that it actually happened and he is NOT coming back whatsoever sucks. I finished cleaning out his house with my brother and going through his boxes of stuff I brought home absolutely sucks. I can't hardly do it some days. Just different things that I find that he had or he did, it just breaks my heart. I found different things he wrote or did for softball, or us kids, or calendars and notes he wrote to remember something. It just brings it all back. And the pictures, my lands, the pictures. You just really don't realize all the time that has literally just flown by.
I help coach my daughter's softball team. On the way to practice I think about how he used to do it. He coached softball from the time I was four until 2007 when he was diagnosed. He loved softball. Next to hunting and fishing, it was his world and he was known for it. Everyone locally knew him as an awesome coach. He was really good at it. I strive to coach like he did. I learned alot from him watching him coach the last several years and remembering things he did, his attitude toward coaching his girls. "Its not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game", "you can't hit what you can't see", "pick dirt up when you catch a ball on the ground" "you hurt the ball more than it hurts you"...I still to this day hear him say those things and I catch myself repeating those phrases to my girls now. I hope one day I am half the coach he was. He was truly awesome. Some days the wind blows just right and I hear him telling the girls what to do...other times I see him on a separate field running from first base to the pitchers mound to tell his girl something. Its crazy, I know, but that ballpark was my home away from home my entire life and for years, that man ran it.
Other than that, all I have done the last several weeks is work. I am ready for a break and I get a week off in July, which can't come soon enough.
In other news, our house had a holiday last week. My son turned 7. SEVEN! I almost out of fingers for that child! I can't believe it has been 7 YEARS since I held that sweet little baby boy in my arms and just stared into his eyes. He is such a sweet and brilliant little boy who is absolutely amazed by everything around him. He has such compassion in his heart for those around him and at times he blows me away by things he comes up with, says or even does. What 7 year old child do you know will get $20.00 for his birthday and when he goes to spend it makes sure that he buys something with his money for his little sister? He's done it his entire life and I have never once told him he had or should even do it. That's the kind of sweetness he has about him. He loves to do for others and Shanna is the same way. She always buys Carson a book with her birthday money. I am so proud of my children and I love my son more than anything in the world and I cannot wait to see what life has in store for him. I just still can't believe that my son is 7. Its nuts. I don't even think I am old enough for a 7 year old sometimes!! :)
LOL...more to come later...I promise to try to post more regularly now!
