Happiness.

I came home today to a mostly clean home...and the sound of CCR blaring on the stereo and my husband and kids squealing and laughing and running around and Toby, who was groomed today and looking so fab and smelling wonderful, running all spastic everywhere.

The scene could not be more perfect. I am so thankful for my wonderful, happy family. We have our moments, but I wouldn't trade one of those moments for all the material things in the world.

Oh, and what makes today even more perfect? I got a cute new purse ;0)

Big Day

So, I am freaking out right about now...my surgery is in the morning so wish me luck. I am looking forward to a "good sleep" I am in much much need of that!! :) that is the silver lining I have created for myself.

I had dinner tonight at Olive Garden with my siblings. I love my family. I have so much fun with all of my siblings. We laugh and have a great time. My oldest sister and her husband were separated for several months. THey almost got divorced but called it off and got back together. I love my brother in law and was very happy they worked things out. They have three children together so that is awesome. Now they have decided in an effort to turn over a new leaf and start fresh they are going to be moving back to Wisconsin were his family lives. It breaks my heart to see them and their kids go but I know that it is the best thing for them at this point in their lives.

And the gruesome twosome went back to school today!! They enjoyed it. I didn't get to talk to them about it much because I went to dinner with the family but they were giggling and laughing when I got home and according to my daughter first grade is super fun and fantastic! ha ha ha...she's such a nut. I still can't believe I am even old enough to have a second grader. Doesn't really seem possible!! ;) Time flies when your not looking!

happy belated mother's day... :)

Sorry fellow bloggers...haven't had my computer all weekend. My boss had to work on a brief so I loaned to her while she was at the hospital with her hubby (he's okay now -bless his heart) so she could work on it.

I had the busiest weekend. I watched my little man play ball Friday night. I absolutely love the ball park. Have I mentioned that lately? ha ha ha...he did so good and we FINALLY beat a team that tends to cheat. Okay, the team doesn't, but the coaches are the kind that tend to bend the rules. They weren't happy that we beat them! and my little man hit the winning run in! I was so proud. They all did good. Of course, I worked the concession stand and watched the majority of the game from there. :( but its okay, I don't mind helping out when needed.
Saturday morning we got up at 3:00 a..m. and left for Memphis. We went to watch Pinks All Out. The boys were so excited. I thought it would be nice to get away and spend time with my boys. 3+ hour drive. LONG. and it was POURING DOWN RAIN. I am talking 10 buckets of rain per second. Horrible. Then we get a ticket b/c my tags expired two months ago and I had no clue. We didn't get the reminder in the mail (go figure). We finally get there and its still raining. Well, we were there aaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll day. For like 16 hours of racing. That's alot. and the sun came out after the rain so we were all stinky and sunburned and then it got cold. Yeah, it was miserable but it was fun to watch, I have to admit. But I dreaded the forever long ride home and we were both so tired. I had to drive the last 1/2 of the way back b/c Derek about fell asleep behind the wheel. It was like 1:30 a.m. before we made it home. But Carson had a blast. But I have to admit not worthing missing my teams game on Saturday. They postponed last weekends game to this past Saturday but we had already bought my ticket, so I had to go. :( But its okay.

Then Mother's DAy! We had a lovely lazy day. My mother in law found a little baby turtle and gave it to Shanna. She loved him. She refused to let him go. So we ended up buying a 10 gallon tank (then we found out they carry salmonella - so we got a lid for the tank and come up with the rule that NO ONE TOUCHES THE TURTLE!). He's already spoiled. Got a big ole tank, a few rocks, a little swimming pool with a rock in it and everything!! She even named him Brock. Don't ask, I don't know - why would you name a turtle Brock? She's so silly.

Now, its Monday. the Monday from You Know Where!! But n e who...so that was my weekend. Hopin for a better week!! :) I know, this post is totally retarded and random!! ha ha ha! Talk to you later!!

Grateful...very very grateful

Well, yesterday was the day. I went to the doctor to find out the results of my ct the day before. I was sitting on the table and all I heard when the doctor walked in was "blah blah blah...which surgeon in town do you want to use?" Mom was with me and she said you could just see the color drain from my face. My mind went completely blank...I literally said "uuggghhh..wh..what..huh..why do I have....surgery?" I am sure I sounded like a pathetic mess. I almost started bawling. He was like "um, your ct was CLEAR....so you have to have a colonoscopy". Ha. So, if I would LISTEN that might actually help things! So, good news, my ct was perfect. My abdoment, colon, intestestines, uterus, ovaries and pelvic area show absolutely no abnormalities andlook wonderfully healthy! Praise the Lord!! I was so scared. Like to the point of tears. But the bad news is...I get to have a colonoscopy when I am through with my antibiotics. Yuck. Yuck isn't even the word. UGH.

So last night as I made my wonderfully wonderful biscuits and gravy from scratch I was thinking about how relieved and grateful I was for a clear ct. I got to thinking about the wonderful things I am so thankful for.

1. My husband. I am so lucky to have someone in my life that I can share everything with. He drives me absolutely batty and sometimes (like later last night) I want to hit upside the head with my favorite skillet (the cast iron one he bought me for easter - awwww) but nevertheless, he is my best friend and the other half of me and I absolutely adore him for that. : )

2. My kids. I still can't believe I am even old enough to have an almost 6 year old and a 7 year old (some would argue that I am not) but they amaze me every day with their brilliance and innocence. They are my sole reason for getting up every morning (literally, cause without me they would not make it to school ha ha ha! j/k) and I can't remember how I functioned before without them.

3. My friends. I remember after my kids were born, I honestly had three friends. My husband, and my two best girlfriends. One, BArbie, who I have had since I was 13. who is not my best friend anymore. She is my sister. I have considered her my sister for some time now and I tell people she is my sister. I love her dearly and there is not a thing in the world I wouldn't do for her. She doesn't live close by so I hardly see her, maybe once or twice a year, but I talk to her all the time and I miss her dearly. the other, Brooke, has been my best friend since Derek and I started dating. Her husband is Derek's best friend so we are together every day. I remember how lonely I would get after my kids were born because I went from having tons of friends to having three and it broke my heart. I didn't feel welcome anywhere without them with me. I was depressed and lonely. NOw, I have a great group of friends that I would not trade for the world. I love seeing them all and I am so grateful that they are in my life.

4. My grams and my mom. I know that without these two women, I would not be the person I am today. They are the strongest women I know. The things these women have experienced in their lives is almost at times straight out of a soap opera and its a wonder that they both haven't been committed! I know if I experienced half of what my grams has, I would have to be! I love them dearly and can't imagine life without either of them.

5. Vanilla Rootbeer from Sonic. Ha ha ha..I know! My life owuld not e complete without it! :)

Well, I enough of my ramblings for the day!! I am off to see my lil super hero play some ball tonight. Wish us luck!!

Playing catchup

Okay, so its been awhile...been just a tad bit busy...

Sis-in-law's wedding was last weekend. It was beautiful if I do say so myself. I was thrilled for her. Her day went just as she wanted it. So I was pumped. I slept 7 hours in 2 days, but it was completely worth it. Just to see her relaxed and enjoying her self and so happy. Lord knows at my wedding, I was the exact opposite. But of course, she knew all she had to do was hollar and I would do whatever she needed so she had no reason to stress. Hey, that's what I am here for! :)

A week ago was March 16. It was one month since dad died. It was a hard day. Its still hard to actually grasp that even happened. It gets a little easier as time goes on, but the thought that it actually happened and he is NOT coming back whatsoever sucks. I finished cleaning out his house with my brother and going through his boxes of stuff I brought home absolutely sucks. I can't hardly do it some days. Just different things that I find that he had or he did, it just breaks my heart. I found different things he wrote or did for softball, or us kids, or calendars and notes he wrote to remember something. It just brings it all back. And the pictures, my lands, the pictures. You just really don't realize all the time that has literally just flown by.

I help coach my daughter's softball team. On the way to practice I think about how he used to do it. He coached softball from the time I was four until 2007 when he was diagnosed. He loved softball. Next to hunting and fishing, it was his world and he was known for it. Everyone locally knew him as an awesome coach. He was really good at it. I strive to coach like he did. I learned alot from him watching him coach the last several years and remembering things he did, his attitude toward coaching his girls. "Its not whether you win or lose, but how you play the game", "you can't hit what you can't see", "pick dirt up when you catch a ball on the ground" "you hurt the ball more than it hurts you"...I still to this day hear him say those things and I catch myself repeating those phrases to my girls now. I hope one day I am half the coach he was. He was truly awesome. Some days the wind blows just right and I hear him telling the girls what to do...other times I see him on a separate field running from first base to the pitchers mound to tell his girl something. Its crazy, I know, but that ballpark was my home away from home my entire life and for years, that man ran it.

Other than that, all I have done the last several weeks is work. I am ready for a break and I get a week off in July, which can't come soon enough.

In other news, our house had a holiday last week. My son turned 7. SEVEN! I almost out of fingers for that child! I can't believe it has been 7 YEARS since I held that sweet little baby boy in my arms and just stared into his eyes. He is such a sweet and brilliant little boy who is absolutely amazed by everything around him. He has such compassion in his heart for those around him and at times he blows me away by things he comes up with, says or even does. What 7 year old child do you know will get $20.00 for his birthday and when he goes to spend it makes sure that he buys something with his money for his little sister? He's done it his entire life and I have never once told him he had or should even do it. That's the kind of sweetness he has about him. He loves to do for others and Shanna is the same way. She always buys Carson a book with her birthday money. I am so proud of my children and I love my son more than anything in the world and I cannot wait to see what life has in store for him. I just still can't believe that my son is 7. Its nuts. I don't even think I am old enough for a 7 year old sometimes!! :)

LOL...more to come later...I promise to try to post more regularly now!

Friday Night Fish Fry

We had a fish fry, our family tradition, at my sister's house Friday night. It was so much fun. It was the first time that we have had ALL 14 grandkids and all 8 siblings and their signficant others, with the exception of my hubby and my sister's hubby, present. So there were nearly 30 people there just in our immediate family! crazy huh? It was a blast and I believe that my dad really enjoyed it. I am sure it was nice for him to have all of his kids and grandbabies around. ;)



Me n my dadL-R; F-B: Katrina, Haley, Emma, Aaron, Carson, Andrew, Elizabeth (holding Braylee), Anna, Dad, Kaelyn, Austin, Shanna, Keaton, and Tyler!!

I had such a blast spending time with all of them.

*****

Fast forward two days...and I am spending a day at home on my hubby's birthday doing absolutely nothing, when I should be doing a million things, with a severe headache and a sick baby boy. Boo. I feel so bad for him. His asthma is really acting up and he's congested and the sinus draining is making him throw up. He's just miserable. :( Its a short week for him at school, so I am hoping he is feeling better soon.

My lil hiccup!!

Well, I got to see my lil hiccup last night! My lil hiccup is, of course, my niece, Braylee. Next to my own daughter and son, she is the best thing in the world. She is just a month old now and the sweetest lil thing. I nicknamed her my hiccup b/c only a few minutes after she was born she was looking around and got the hiccups. She is very alert and loves to look around and see what is going on. She is going to be a handful when she is older and a heartbreaker, now doubt. I absolutely love her to pieces!!

hhhmm...

Ok, so I am fairly new to the "blogger world". Obviously. I have started following the blogs of a few people I actually know and from their pages started looking at other blogs. I have decided from looking at these blogs, that mine is probably pretty dull. So I will try to come up with better ideas to make this thing more interesting. I guess I am a pretty dull person huh?

We found out Friday that my dad's cancer is for sure back and it is not looking good. So I have been pretty down the last few days. Its not easty to accept the reality of the situation, even though I should be looking at the blessing that it actually is. I got an extra year with my dad, an extra year they did not think he had in the first place. I got an extra year to spend more time with him, say things to him I should have said a long time ago, and make peace with him over things I should have made peace with him over a long time ago. But still, the reality is still hard to face.

Crazy Week!

This week has been absolute chaos! First, I get up late Monday, I was an hour late for work (luckily, Monday was a holiday so it didn't really matter b/c we only worked part of the day anyway). I didn't get ANY housework done last weekend so I was hoping to catch up Monday, but b/c I was late, I got jack done. Then, Tuesday, I have to update my computer b/c its acting all retarded and apparently I needed to update the Windows service pack. So I update. and afterward...OMG...It has erased all of my dictation that I had not finished just yet, erased my connection to my scanner and my printer was acting up. Nevermind that it took half the day to update so I had to work on my second computer at the office. Yes, our office is sometimes so crazy and I get backed up and need to work away from the phones and front door that we actually have a second work station in the back for me to work on. Sad huh? :) anywho...Well, then yesterday I can't get anything done for the computer being retarded and several disability appointments. Today? My printer QUIT. It quit! Ok, for those of you that don't know, a legal secretary without a working printer is like a faucet with no spout. basically, useless. So for half the day, while my boss drove to Benton to get a new one, I was unable to do much of anything. So my Friday, which is supposed to be my short day, will no doubt be an extremely LOOOONNNGGG one. Boo.

Oh, and they are coming to tape and mud my walls and get ready to spray my ceiling and walls to get them ready to paint and my house is a wreck and nowhere near ready. I have weeks worth of laundry to catch up on. I need to do the billing at the office (I reckon I will be bringing that home to do). I just look at my little pig pen and go "why me?" I can clean it immaculate and when my hubby and kids walk through the door its as if everything I just cleaned goes 'WWWOOOO HOOOO" and jumps back into the floor, or on the bars, or the book shelf, or the couch and the laundry magically appears back in the hampers. Its crazy.

On top of the stress and anxiety I have about my house, I am very nervous about my dad going back to the doctor tomorrow. I am so nervous that it is going to be bad. Please pray for him. He was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in July, 2007. We have been so blessed to have had the last year with him. He spent Christmas and New Years of 2007 in the hospital struggling to survive and since he came home in February, 2008, I have been trying to stay closer to him than I have in the past. I am so thankful the Lord felt compelled to bless me and my siblings with another year with him. He got to see my little brother have a baby. He got to see his granddaughter start softball, which was a huge part of his life prior to getting sick. The last year has truly been a learning and growing experience for my family. So keep him in your prayers that everything turns out okay tomorrow!! I am going to attempt to get some sleep tonight, although that hasn't really been in the cards the last couple of days! :)

Until next time...

Wedding Planner

My sister in law is getting married in two months. She is nineteen and they have been together for YEARS. She only has two brothers, I married the oldest and the other is in college and as far as I know has never had a serious girlfriend ever. So I am really the closest thing she has had to a sister. I love my sister in law to pieces and could not be more excited for her. I have soooo wanted to help out with the planning and everything, especially since Derek and I planned our wedding in barely over a month and there were so many misteps (even though my wedding was beautiful, had everything and everyone I wanted there - it was just sloppy in some areas and there are a few things now I wish I did that then I didn't really care about). But, its her day and I did not want to step on my mother in laws toes or Alli's toes by "butting in". So I have waited for them to ask me for help and they did...FINALLY! I was busting at the seams with ideas and within three days, I had the bouquets roughed, the arch figured out, the candleabra arrangements done...as you can see, we are doing it ourselves which I LOVE. We went to the church last night just the three of us and we went over everything. Where the decor would go, where the party would stand, everything. And then I came home and picked out her music. Luckily, Alli and I are somewhat alike and I have a pretty good idea of what she would like and what she would absolutely hate. Its a simple, beautiful, small town wedding in a small town church that she and her brothers grew up in since infancy...and I must say...it's turning out perfect. :) I could not be more thrilled. Here's a few of the pictures of the "rough" bouquets and the trial run on the candleabra that I did....tell me what you think!!

Poker Night!

We went to our bff's house last night. The kids were begging to spend the night with their great grandmother,who they are extremely close to, so me and the hubby had a night out. :)

We just hung out. The guys had a few beers and we all sat down and played poker. We are goobers and when we play poker we play for change. Or at least we used to. Trav got a new set of poker chips around Christmas and I was not aware we were going to use those. So I got a roll of quarters for nothing! Anyway, Derek and I started with $5.00 each. By the end of the night, Derek was flat broke and I had made $13 (well, $17 if you count the $4.00 I gave him through out the night...ha ha ha). I was pretty stoked! I kept my money, took Derek's and made some money! I was so proud of myself. :)

Well, it was an early night for us. Derek has to work for the next three nights so I will be all by my lonesome. Its also Saturday night so the kids will be with my inlaws (or they usually are). I am supposed to go to my brothers house for a party tonight to hang out with my friends. Its not every weekend that my kids go somewhere every night, but this happened to be an exception. Plus its a long weekend for them, I think they should have a lil extra fun!! Tomorrow is Sunday, which means housework for mom! Boo!!! Talk to you later!

**Courtney**