The last Three Weeks....from you know where

Well, I know I have been gone a while...the last three weeks have been a nightmare. First, you know I was sick. Got over it and moved on. Missed one day of work. Boo. I hate missing work for a whole day and I rarely do unless the office is closed and sometimes not even then. But if the office is open, I hate not being there. Stuff piles up, and it is just not pleasant.

The next week, Carson is sick. Bad. And Shanna. Carson has strep and its miss diagnosed for the whole week. He threw up from Sunday through Thursday. Thursday he ended up in the hospital for him to be diangosed with dehydration and an ear infection on top of it. Something apparently his doc couldn't diagnose at the clinic. FRUSTRATING!!!!! I missed two days of work.

The next week took the cake. On Monday, February 16, 2009, the Lord called my Dad home. I was at work and got the call around 2 that he had less than 24 hours. Since I had missed Wednesday and Thursday the week before, I HAD to get a few more things done. I left at 3 and around 4:45 he was gone. I was there with my siblings. It was the hardest thing I have ever done was watch my dad, the strongest man I ever knew growing up, take his last dying breath. It was devestating. The week was spent making funeral arrangements. I worked part of the day Wednesday and was going to work all day Thursday b/c the visitation wasn't until Friday night and the funeral Saturday morning. The school called at 1:00 and said Shanna had diahrrea. So I went to get her. I passed out at home from shear exhaustion and woke up at 7:00 p.m. with fever. I had strep throat. I was freaking out. My hubby got me antibiotics the next morning and the next two days I was in a medicated fog. I barely made it through everything and finally had my breakdown on Sunday night when I was home alone and the kids were in bed and hubby was at work.

The last three weeks have been torture. I am looking for some sunny skys and good times. But I still miss my dad and haven't yet hit the realization that he is gone. We were at the ball park and it just broke my heart that he wasn't going to be there anymore. He loved that ball park. He spent the last twenty years there and he is gone. It is going to take more than I thought to heal.

hhhmm...

Ok, so I am fairly new to the "blogger world". Obviously. I have started following the blogs of a few people I actually know and from their pages started looking at other blogs. I have decided from looking at these blogs, that mine is probably pretty dull. So I will try to come up with better ideas to make this thing more interesting. I guess I am a pretty dull person huh?

We found out Friday that my dad's cancer is for sure back and it is not looking good. So I have been pretty down the last few days. Its not easty to accept the reality of the situation, even though I should be looking at the blessing that it actually is. I got an extra year with my dad, an extra year they did not think he had in the first place. I got an extra year to spend more time with him, say things to him I should have said a long time ago, and make peace with him over things I should have made peace with him over a long time ago. But still, the reality is still hard to face.

Crazy Week!

This week has been absolute chaos! First, I get up late Monday, I was an hour late for work (luckily, Monday was a holiday so it didn't really matter b/c we only worked part of the day anyway). I didn't get ANY housework done last weekend so I was hoping to catch up Monday, but b/c I was late, I got jack done. Then, Tuesday, I have to update my computer b/c its acting all retarded and apparently I needed to update the Windows service pack. So I update. and afterward...OMG...It has erased all of my dictation that I had not finished just yet, erased my connection to my scanner and my printer was acting up. Nevermind that it took half the day to update so I had to work on my second computer at the office. Yes, our office is sometimes so crazy and I get backed up and need to work away from the phones and front door that we actually have a second work station in the back for me to work on. Sad huh? :) anywho...Well, then yesterday I can't get anything done for the computer being retarded and several disability appointments. Today? My printer QUIT. It quit! Ok, for those of you that don't know, a legal secretary without a working printer is like a faucet with no spout. basically, useless. So for half the day, while my boss drove to Benton to get a new one, I was unable to do much of anything. So my Friday, which is supposed to be my short day, will no doubt be an extremely LOOOONNNGGG one. Boo.

Oh, and they are coming to tape and mud my walls and get ready to spray my ceiling and walls to get them ready to paint and my house is a wreck and nowhere near ready. I have weeks worth of laundry to catch up on. I need to do the billing at the office (I reckon I will be bringing that home to do). I just look at my little pig pen and go "why me?" I can clean it immaculate and when my hubby and kids walk through the door its as if everything I just cleaned goes 'WWWOOOO HOOOO" and jumps back into the floor, or on the bars, or the book shelf, or the couch and the laundry magically appears back in the hampers. Its crazy.

On top of the stress and anxiety I have about my house, I am very nervous about my dad going back to the doctor tomorrow. I am so nervous that it is going to be bad. Please pray for him. He was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in July, 2007. We have been so blessed to have had the last year with him. He spent Christmas and New Years of 2007 in the hospital struggling to survive and since he came home in February, 2008, I have been trying to stay closer to him than I have in the past. I am so thankful the Lord felt compelled to bless me and my siblings with another year with him. He got to see my little brother have a baby. He got to see his granddaughter start softball, which was a huge part of his life prior to getting sick. The last year has truly been a learning and growing experience for my family. So keep him in your prayers that everything turns out okay tomorrow!! I am going to attempt to get some sleep tonight, although that hasn't really been in the cards the last couple of days! :)

Until next time...